That_Renault_Guy
That_Renault_Guy HalfDork
2/20/16 1:13 p.m.

Two important points before I get to the main deal ....

1) My mother-in-law's new husband (Danny) is a total ass. Although usually harmless, he tells complete BS stories about his past, makes outlandish promises that he doesn't follow through with, etc.

2) I have been traveling to Turkey a lot for work since last fall. I've been on a pretty steady rotation of two weeks here and then one week home since September. I personally have never felt unsafe here, but my family has (understandably) expressed concern for my safety being on this part of the world.

Anyway, since this week was winter break my mother in-law took our girls (13 and 9) for a few days - both for a nice visit but also to give my wife a little break from single parent duty. Everything was going fine until jackass Danny decided to start a conversation with the kids by saying, "I saw on the news that there was a terrorist bombing today real close to where your dad is and a bunch of people died"

What the berk could you possibly be thinking to tell them that???? Not to mention that Ankara is about four hours away from where I am, but seriously WTF????

IndyJoe
IndyJoe Reader
2/20/16 1:30 p.m.

What a BERKING Idiot ! If it continues, you and your wife may want to consider limiting or eliminating the girls' exposure to this IDIOT !

mad_machine
mad_machine MegaDork
2/20/16 1:36 p.m.

even if the bombing was right next to the hotel you were staying at.. why would anybody tell two little girls that?

Kia_Racer
Kia_Racer SuperDork
2/20/16 1:37 p.m.

I would have a "nice" talk with him about childhood and innocence. If it continues let the MIL come over to visit the grandkids and make sure he knows he is not welcome.

DrBoost
DrBoost UltimaDork
2/20/16 2:03 p.m.

Yeah, time to have a talk with him, and the kids. My FIL is a real tool. Seeks attention like a 3 year old. I had to let him have it when he wasn't obeying the rules of my house. He's much better now.

914Driver
914Driver MegaDork
2/20/16 2:20 p.m.

Have a talk, you're the parent.

STFU you're a Grandpa, act like one!

Datsun310Guy
Datsun310Guy PowerDork
2/20/16 2:57 p.m.

I have a 13 year old girl and I found out I have to be careful with what I say as she takes it to heart.

That_Renault_Guy
That_Renault_Guy HalfDork
2/20/16 3:00 p.m.
Datsun310Guy wrote: I have a 13 year old girl and I found out I have to be careful with what I say as she takes it to heart.

The 13yo is extremely sensitive (always has been). I've been on damage control with her for two days now since this incident. The 9yo is pretty easy going, just a quick "I'm ok" was sufficient for her.

WildScotsRacing
WildScotsRacing Reader
2/20/16 3:29 p.m.

Been there, somewhat. Time to put your foot down on your girls' exposure to this guy. NO exposure to him unless YOU are physically present, as in, in the same room. Leave with the girls (or declare him to be trespassing and show him the door, with or without SWMBO's mother, if they are at your house) the instant he says anything stupid. And tell him to his face in the presence of SWMBO and MIL, what the consequences will be the very next time he attempts to stir the pot. And then stick to yout word, no matter what family feud it starts.

Streetwiseguy
Streetwiseguy PowerDork
2/20/16 3:57 p.m.

I can easily bring up the vision of my grade 6 teacher, in 1972, telling us about how the Yom Kippur war was likely to turn into WW3...

Some of us just didn't need that stuff.

ncjay
ncjay Dork
2/20/16 5:50 p.m.

This could also be a good time to try and teach your kids about "crazy" people and how to deal with them. See kids, Danny is a moron nutjob, don't be like Danny. Danny is a sociopath, we don't listen to anything he says. The earlier your kids learn how to spot and identify people like this, the quicker they can get away from them. If someone had only told me, my life would be much different.

That_Renault_Guy
That_Renault_Guy HalfDork
2/20/16 6:03 p.m.
ncjay wrote: This could also be a good time to try and teach your kids about "crazy" people and how to deal with them. See kids, Danny is a moron nutjob, don't be like Danny. Danny is a sociopath, we don't listen to anything he says. The earlier your kids learn how to spot and identify people like this, the quicker they can get away from them. If someone had only told me, my life would be much different.

This is excellent advice.

Brett_Murphy
Brett_Murphy PowerDork
2/20/16 8:34 p.m.

Based on that, it's possible he doesn't like your kids.

captdownshift
captdownshift UltraDork
2/20/16 11:48 p.m.

Time to teach them about sociopaths that teach lies and hate that breed and recruit terrorism, and point out that theyre never to believe in or follow any of Danny's twisted beliefs, or drink any batches of kool-aid that he makes

novaderrik
novaderrik UltimaDork
2/21/16 1:33 a.m.
Brett_Murphy wrote: Based on that, it's possible he doesn't like your kids.

he might like the kids just fine, but still feels the need to use them to cause problems because of how he feels about their parents. he might even think he does it for their own good.

some people are idiots and just never grow up.

WildScotsRacing
WildScotsRacing Reader
2/21/16 8:59 a.m.

In reply to novaderrik:

Hence, my suggestion of laying down the law, face to face with SWMBO, MIL and MIL's new man and then sticking to your word no matter how much family tension it causes. He can either abstain 100% from stirring the pot, or he will never see them again.

Hungary Bill
Hungary Bill UltraDork
2/21/16 8:23 p.m.

What a small, small worthless man.

Here is someone who hasn't done a damn thing with his life, is probably poorly educated, and is very jealous of you because he thinks your life of international travel must be soooooooo glamorous.

Maybe instead of dealing with an idiot that's never going to change, you can take the opportunity and explain to your children what a pathological liar is, and how focusing your attention bitterness and jealousy towards other peoples success instead of internal reflection and self improvement leads to a person becoming a "Danny". Given their ages, I bet they're mature enough to understand (and may help them build a wall to his "attacks" later).

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