Oops.
wow, yall came up with 328 pages of different ways to say ignore this. was there something here i was supposed to ignore?
I had ignored this thread for years and then I read the wiki page about the forum that I go to everyday anyway and it talked about this and I found it hard to ignore this time.
Ignoring the appearance that the seller I was talking to and had what I thought were solid plans last night, may have sold the car out from under me.
pheller said:I'm a very chatty person. I tend to have vocal opinions about almost everything except for sports and booze, which I really don't give a damn about.
As I've gotten older, I've started to notice there is definitely a segment of the population who has strong feelings about
A) "The Sole Contributor" - being the talker/opinionated one in their social group, and
B) "Do Something About it Enforcer" - one does not get to voice their opinion unless they are intimately involved with the topic at hand.
The first case is one that I usually find on social media. We meet through shared friends, and have good conversation in person. We generally get along in public - but online, it's like they want their social media to be "them only". They broadcast often interesting topics, and every time someone chimes in with something critical, or more information about the topic - they delete those comments. Even among people whom they might agree, every comment that is "100% agree" is viewed as aggressive denial of the topic at hand. "Good Vibes Only" seems to ring true.
The 2nd case is something that comes up in both personal and business settings. At first, I thought I was the victim of it, then I realized I might also be the perpetrator.
It's that of the "Respectable Doer-Talker" - that is, someone who can back up their talk with actions.
I've got a busy life, I've got ADHD, and I tend to enjoy talking more than doing (unless I'm riding). I understand that sometimes you've gotta put in the sweat equity, and as I've gotten older I've been able to dial in my "results" to match my "talk", but there are still areas for which I feel passionate, still need to learn, and still want to be a part of the conversation. I am NOT a doer-talker in most conversations. I've tried to catch myself, especially in a business setting, of stepping up on project for which I have strong opinions about. I don't want me or my team to be passed over as "oh, they don't care" when yes, we do care ,and we want to be involved.
In my personal life however, its way harder to be the Respectable Doer-Talker. I just had a local long-time businessman tell me in a personal setting "shut up" about my opinions of how local policy changes might our city for the better. He's VERY liberal. We agree on a lot of topics, but some topics for which he benefit are "off the table" in terms of my input. His contention is I'm attacking his livelihood (real estate), so unless I'm there in the trenches with him, I shouldn't voice my opinion.
What are your thoughts on contributing, both in personal and business settings, on things for which you might only have a minor stake? In your opinion, in order for someone's opinion to be valid, do they have to have had major experience, or daily interaction with that topic?
Ignoring my apprehension about spending a metric E36 M3 ton of money on a cruise that I'm not sure I will enjoy at all.
I will try to ignore this in the future. :)
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